Men Express Themselves
The One Who Got Away...
By Russell A. Irving
Of course, most of us can remember 'The One Who Got Away'. And, thinking of... fantasizing about them, has been a pretty common activity for most spouses, over the years. Especially when the relationship with our actual spouse became rocky at best, horrific, at worst.
Yet, now, Facebook has taken this pastime to a new level. One which can be very dangerous. As obvious as this would appear to be, there are so many wives and husbands out there who find the temptation too great to resist. They search for and strike up a renewed relationship with the former 'love of their life'. Even though many of these loves were, in fact, never more than a fantasy, back then!
Perhaps we are so self-centered that we believe that we do deserve to have a real and an online romance.
So, what is my point? Simply that fantasizing about a past real or imagined lover is one things. But acting upon it is plain stupid and wrong! Be an adult, if you truly want a divorce. Ask for one and then start up the fling. And, if you somehow believe that cyberflirting is an innocent game, then you have the same mentality as many adolescents: that you are invincible. Yet, as with them, the premise is seriously flawed.
Do you honestly believe that if you and your 'Friend From Days Gone By' were not capable of making romance and daily life work, years ago, that you are such different people now? More compatible? That you each did not grow and change but still in different, incompatible ways?
Divorce has become far too easy, just as 'hooking up' with a past friend or lover has. - Each does have a place. But, certainly not as a way to avoid working on your marriage to determine how you can help to make it better, for each one of you.
Russell Irving is a media-acclaimed, expert on Single Life, Marriage, and more. – His book, Improve Your Marriage – Don’t Overlook The Obvious applies to couples in a 'long term relationship' and is available at Amazon.com, BarnesAndNoble.com, as well as the book’s companion site, www.DontOverlookTheObvious.com . Check out his YouTube channel, ImprovingMarriages. His Facebook page is Russell Irving. And, Twitter name is RussIrving.