Men Express Themselves
Where men can share their points of view and more.
Where women can learn about men.





By Russell A. Irving

Who am I referring to? You, of course! Or, your spouse... Or...

When we date, we typically want to impress the other person. So we go out of our way to do extra special nice things for the other person. Perhaps we even shower them with expensive gifts.
And, when we marry them, we might even continue these practices.

Now, I will be the first to advise you of the wisdom of treating your spouse, 'special'. Of occasionally pampering them. Of letting them know just how special they are to you.
But, you will not find me advocating a continuous spoiling of them.

Why? What's the difference?
Pampering is to indulge with special treatment. It typically has limits in terms of length of time. And should accompany, simply basic, good and thoughtful and kind behavior.
Spoiling, by at least 1 definition, is to harm character by overindulgence.

When we spoil our spouses in an ongoing fashion. Allowing them to not only be treated as if they were royalty, but to allow them to believe in their royal blood line and entitlement... We create a 'monster' of sorts. And, who wants to bed a monster? Let alone live with one, day-to-day.

This is all a way of my advising that when you create an atmosphere of expecting spoiling, then you will, obviously, get someone who will not likely compromise, concede when appropriate, or treat you as an equal. This person will place impossible demands and blame you when they cannot be met. They will drain you. And, eventually, you will either 'wither away' or 'run away'.

So, bottom-line, occasionally pamper your spouse. But avoid spoiling them.

'Nuff said!