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The Secret To Attracting A Date/ Mate Revealed

Russell Irving

You probably don't know that you do it. But, many of you, guys and gals are guilty of this self-sabotage. And, trust me when I say that it can help to make or break that 1st, 2nd, or... date!

What am I talking about?
Let me beat around the bush, first.

How many of you guys think that Julia Roberts is attractive? Jennifer Hudson? Pamela Anderson?
And, ladies, how about Sylvester Stallone or Tom Cruise or... ?
Each of these sexy, attractive, appealing celebrities has some type of physical 'flaw'. yet, we tend to overlook them. But, why?

Here's a fairly true story.
There once was a smart, personable, charming guy who had friends in college but dates were pretty much out of his reach. The ones that he had were more 'friend' dates. - Then, one day, he was advised by co-workers to 'get with it'. Do something his hair. Grow a beard. Get 'with it' cloths. Feel self-confidence, especially when he was around the opposite sex. It took a while, but eventually he did it!
As you might imagine by now, that fellow was me.
Because a special and highly effective key to attracting a date and lover is to feel confident. And, to pay attention to hygiene and outfits.

Think I'm wrong? Well, think about it the next time you are at a nightclub, restaurant, or even a mall. Watch how many 'stereotypically' beautiful women and handsome men are with dates who don't quite seem to match their looks.  Then, stare at these 'lookers' and you will notice flaws. Their nose might be slightly crooked. Eyebrows are too thick or too thin. Their ears are large even if covered by a nice hairstyle. Perhaps their butt is too large, their waist too scrawny, their breasts too large, too small, or uneven.

The secret, such as it is, simply equals self-confidence. (Not to be confused with cockiness or coldness.) Added to a great sense of personal (stress the 'personal') style. (And, cleanliness.)
I remember dating a knockout, gorgeous lady who was just a bit_ch. And, then dating a lady who resembled the star of the show, Drop Dead Diva, who was sensuous and exciting, beyond belief.

Now, I would be remiss if I did not warn you against 'false advertising'. What do I mean? Well, I recently cut through the lingerie and undergarment section of a large department store. There were racks upon racks of these bras whose cups were hard and would not conform to a lady's bosom. They were artificially large and 'perfectly contoured'. They might help attract a guy, but what happens if & when they spend the night together? He might be in for a bit of a shock or disappointment!
And, don't wear muscle shirts, guys, if you are built like a toothpick. Don't wear shorts if your legs look like kitchen table spindles.
In other words dress to accentuate who you are and what assets you truly have!

Before any of you go on to the next article, mumbling under your breath that I must not know what I was talking about...
Back to that man who I was describing earlier. - One day after a TV interview regarding my work with Singles, a woman who wouldn't even give me the time of day in high school, called me up for a date! I was still me. But a 'new, better designed' model.

While your 'insides' are what truly (should) matter the most when dating or mating, you need to first attract the other person, so that you get to spend time together. It's not being phony. It's being the best that you can be!

'Nuff said.

copyright - R. Irving 2012