Men Express Themselves
AN OFFER TO HELP YOU
You might not need their help with a task.
How many times have you asked yourself, "Why don't they ever offer to give me a hand?".
Well, there might be a number of reasons why they don't offer to do so. - But, today, let's look at what happens when they do offer, at a time when you might not want or need their assistance.
Picture it, you're organizing one of the children's closets or washing the car. And, from out of the blue, your spouse offers to lend you a hand. And, you know in your heart of hearts that you are better at these tasks than they will ever be. (At least, that's what you believe.) - So, you decide to turn down their offer. - And, later on, they appear to be annoyed with you or short-tempered or sullen. Believing that you haven't done anything to deserve such an attitude, you 'strike back' with your own attitude. And, what might have been a relaxing Saturday, together, becomes one of those, 'I can't believe that I would rather it Monday', days!
Step back. And think.
Perhaps, they offered to help you out, because they figured that the sooner you were done with chores, the sooner that you could be doing something together. Something fun! And, they know that you would typically jump from one task to another, before even entertaining the notion of R&R, together. And, that all too often, by the time that you are done with chores, you are too pooped for anything. (Emphasis on the word 'anything'!)
Another possibility is that they are not even contemplating a banking of energy or time for later activities. They simply enjoy your company! And, have not had their fill of it, lately, for one reason or another. That they are willing to join you in mundane or exhausting tasks, because it affords them the opportunity to chat with you. Flirt with you, outside of the bedroom. Share a tough day/ week. Or, simply be in the immediate vicinity of the person whom they love. All, without a devious, ulterior motive, in mind.
So be flattered! And, welcome the offer. And, above all else, don't be all critical of their work. Act like a team of equals. If guidance is needed, do it with love, not exasperation or vindictiveness. (You're their partner and lover. Not their parent or teacher!)
*(From the book, IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE - DON'T OVERLOOK THE OBVIOUS.